Tail Chasing

What does busy look like to you?

Is it waking up – getting everyone to daycare and/or school – going to work – getting as much as you can get done there, knowing that it’s never going to be enough – going home in time to pick up kids, make dinner, take everyone to all practices – going back home – helping kid’s finish their homework – getting everyone showered and in bed so you have just enough time to do laundry and make lunches for tomorrow?

Or is it waking up early to get to work early – to work through lunch – to get home late – to work some more at home after dinner – to go to bed and not be able to sleep because of the thought of how much more there is to do?

Maybe it’s more like sleeping until 15 minutes before your first class – rushing from building to building until classes are done – meeting up with friends for coffee and homework before getting ready for the game that night – running to the store to pick up things you forgot you needed this week – eating dinner – going to the game – hanging out with people for a bit – remembering the homework that still needs to be completed before classes tomorrow – heading to the dorm where you run into people you haven’t see all week – chatting for a minute or two (ok, more like 30!) – heading to your room to finish the homework…

Each of those examples made me exhausted just typing them!

Which one did you identify with?

Busy is busy regardless of what activity is being crammed in.

Where, in any of those scenarios, is there time to “be still”?

If we choose to be that busy all the time, then it is a fight to be still when a moment is given.

How do I know this?

I am the Queen of ALL Queens when it comes to being busy!

I used to wear it as a badge of honor.

I used to think I was super important because I was crazy busy.

I used to base my worth on my productivity.

I also used to have heart problems – both literally and figuratively, and they stemmed from my busyness.

“For if our hearts are restless, stillness will elude us.” ~ Chara Donahue

What I found to be true for me was that I was so busy trying to control my life that I had taken God’s plan, revised it to fit my likings and then ran, pushed, tripped and fought my way through every day.

EX – HAUS – TING!!!!!

“We will not, cannot, give the uncertainties closest to our hearts to God unless we are certain He is more powerful than ourselves.” ~ Chara Donahue

I would love to tell you that I am “fixed”, that I am full of zen and stillness, that I am obedient to every step God places in front of me and I walk the straight and narrow…

But alas, that would be far from the truth!

What I have learned, though, is when I allow myself to sit quietly in the stillness of the early morning and offer my day to the Lord, then He can design my To Do list.

The benefit to this has been that I can knock it out the best I can, with the reassurance that it is ok if I don’t get it all done. God will write me a new one the next day that has His priorities on top, not mine.

I still struggle with stillness, but I am becoming more and more aware of my state of craziness and am getting better at recognizing when I am focused on conquering rather than The Conqueror.

A few questions for you to think on this weekend are:

“To what end are you chasing your tail?”

“Where is your stillness to be found?”

“If God were to look into your heart right now, what would He find – joy, frustration, insecurity, love, bitterness?”

Leave a comment and let me know how you find stillness in your days.

If you haven’t found it yet, tell me where your struggling and let’s pray through it.